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 There are so many things in this world. As many as stars in the sky. 

There are billions of people in this world. Billions of topics, billions of songs, billions of books. Billions of restaurants and dishes. 

We are so miniscule and insignificant in comparison. 

Yet our lives are all consuming and we curl in our own corner of familiarity. 

Changes are scary and sudden.

You would think in a world of connectivity that loneliness would cease to exist. 

Yet it sinks us into the depths of pain. Waking up alone. Sleeping alone. Doing nothing alone. 

Having a presence around makes it better and worse at the same time. Making it unable for one to sink into work, into my own thoughts without having another person influencing it, causing eddies in the beautiful flow I've formulated for myself.

Support comes so scarce these days. Or is it because I chose to grow. 

Maybe growth and learning comes with being comfortable in a place of uncomfortablility. And I should learn to be comfortable with myself. 

It's sad. It's isolating. It's giving up the most important things in the world. Ultimately, I don't think I'll ever see the world as it is. 

I need to information to know whether or not I should invest time into certain things and relationships. Where's the balance between having enough information to decide to give up, or sticking around to see the beautiful things that would've happened. 

I'm not wise enough. 

I'm impatient. Unable to get to the end fast enough, yet dreading the end at the same time.

What a paradox.

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